Just checked in to say hello- new member

Hi , its 5.54am having another bad nights sleep here just got up made hot drink . did a search for help on my adapted computor with jaws software for visually impaired people as am haunted by lots traumas ive experienced over the last 12 yrs. I am diagnosed with PTSD with flashbacks. Had a road traffic acident ( through no fault of my own ). been physically assulted, had 2 brain injuries, resulting in diagnosed & trying to cope with grand mall epileptic seizures not controlled. Was diagnosed / registered FULL BLIND due to the assult .Have had 6 yrs of hate crime from various neighbours / residents due to my disabilities ( in which the county police have been involved in all the time as well as my MP. couty councillors. town mayors. etc etc, lost my son at an early age , lost my mother suddenly to cancer, saw my best friend shot / killed at close range. have had to move home manytimes to escape the hate crime & live in solitary confinment/ housebaound / isolated from society like a prisoner in my own home for 6 yrs. Recently was hospitalised. the local social services had to get a care agency in to care for me 4 visits a day. I was firstly asked by the carers what could i see as they knew i was registered full blind- i told them the truth nothing only brief shadows. Thats when my Ordeal started. being bed bound in one room, full blind/ hearing difficulties( hearing aids),with catherter insterted by hospital i was you may say VULNERABLE . I was treated really badly to the extent that im so depressed,having flashbacks , cant sleep. not eating, cant concentrate, finding it hard to trust anyone new,etc etc etc. I was shouted at, my personal hygine was neglected ( hair not washed for 2 weeks, nails long with dirt in, bed sores, was not washed bottom half of my body where catherter was inserted hence got thrush. was not given food, or water was dehyrating ( which 2 district nurses who visited me witnessed /noted / complained to my social worker about as they had to make me drinks & food ). They carers also went through all of my personal belongings in every room including my late sons & mothers things that i have left to remind me of them, the carers damaged furniture, etc etc. The CHERRY ON THE CAKE came when my telephone provider informed me taht my phone bill was high due to the usage of mobile calls made from my landline ????? of which i now know theese 15 mobile calls from my landline were made by theese so called carers (WITHOUT MY PERMISSION). police were informed but they tell me its NOT a criminal offence for someone to use your home phone without permission???the local social services were also informed - they told me they had to safeguard me being a vulnerable adult, the council have changed all locks on my doors. Now the social services are saying im NOT safegaurded AND that the care agency have'nt done anythimg wrong ??? even though i have plenty of evidence. their investigation by the way took only 7 days ( without all the evidence by a person who has never spoken to me on the phone OR visited me ? ) strange or what .h Human rights, etc state it is not right how ive been / am treated. my social worker even stated that PTSD with flashbacks & depression is NOT a mental illness & that he said the Crisis team from mental health DID NOT need to be brought in for anything / NOT even a little bit of support/understanding/ emapthy. I am totally lost here , never felt so abandoned/ isolated/ rejected & badly treated in my life by the authorities. Alcohol has started to become a dependancy as coping is getting tougher. i dont even go out the house YET still get added trauma's from social services, etc phoning daily to give me a hard time in their unprofessional telephone manner . WHY is It that people diagnosed with ptsd are treated badly ? instead of goverment authorities having some empathy & trying to help us come to terms with our traumas- THEY ARE ACTUALLY ADDING TRAUMAS TO THE FILLING CABINET IN MY HEAD WHERE I HAVE HAD TO STACK TRAUMAS AS THEY HAPPEN - due to the anti social enviroment/ neighbours etc . Im sorry to go on & on. its now 6.44am ive been sat here writing this since 5,54am . id better have a cup of coffee & fag i spose to set me up for todays TRIAL(s). heaven knows whats going to transpire TODAY . I just keep prayng this nightmare will go away someday soon & be at peace. i would really like to hear from anyone out there whos is going through thier nightmare(s) &iwth view of helping each other trough all. Take special care everyone , my thoughts are with you all out there who are suffring this condition . Kind regards ~pete

Warm welcome to this site Dream Warrior.
Your story has left me humbled and shocked. You did the right thing by posting here as at least all of us understand trauma and its devastating aftermath. It is so horrendous and criminal that your "care workers" are abusing you in this manner. Is there anything I can do to help? I am here to listen and offer support. You are an astonishingly braze and amazing person.

S

Hello Dreamwarrior,

You were certainly factual when you stated the mental health teams were treating people with PTSD badly!

I myself have found this, but you know what, I have told them they are crap and inexperienced and not qualified for their jobs! Fact is, that only people who have experienced PTSD can actually relate to it. Forget the diplomas, forget the degrees, all wasteful papers if you ask me!

So thats where the likes of me and others on this site exist. Because we as a group can only support each other.

Now having read your story, if there are continuations in your carers abusing you in any way, please contact me direct and I will investigate the matter and believe me I truly will!

I have over the months got better and back to my former self and won't tolerate any person with PTSD being abused in anyway!!!

Peter

Peter wrote:Hello Dreamwarrior,

You were certainly factual when you stated the mental health teams were treating people with PTSD badly!

I myself have found this, but you know what, I have told them they are crap and inexperienced and not qualified for their jobs! Fact is, that only people who have experienced PTSD can actually relate to it. Forget the diplomas, forget the degrees, all wasteful papers if you ask me!

So thats where the likes of me and others on this site exist. Because we as a group can only support each other.

Now having read your story, if there are continuations in your carers abusing you in any way, please contact me direct and I will investigate the matter and believe me I truly will!

I have over the months got better and back to my former self and won't tolerate any person with PTSD being abused in anyway!!!

Peter

Hello peter manythanks for your kind words of support & most of all your understanding of p.t.s.d . i things are just getting frombad to worse here, what with the care abuse thing 7 now social services abuse / neglect etc.... sorry am just lost for words tonight .....................takecare very best pete

Hi

I read your story with increasing anger and shock. I too am a new member. Unlike you though, I have had very good care from my gp and the mental health services. I am amazed that your social worker told you PTSD isn't a mental illness! Doens't what he is talking about. Have you tried contacting your gp and getting referred. Also your local authority should have a PALS service for mental health. Pals is a NHS support organisation run by voluneers and they offer an advocacy service. They could support you and help you get more help maybe. Anyway it might be worth a try. If you have problems locating them in your area, let me know which town/city you live in and I will look it up for you on the internet and emal you the number. You shouldn't have to put up with this.

Hope you feel better today,

Healing thoughts

Mags

Hi Mags much appreciate your kind worsds / support . with all due respect my gp has no clue re; ptsd. have tried pals & advocacy ( who cant help ,im told go back to your gp ). have had 2 town mayors . Mp. numerous county councillors fightinf for me over the yrs etc. no one in this county seems to want to know ! my SS worker has told me this week that he's no longer my social worker as theres nothing he can do for me . felt so desperate / felt like edning it all actually spoke to some one at the maytree ( respite / sanctuary unit - london ) as i just need a break to get stronger & think clearly . again im told SORRY though it sounds horific what your going through we ant help you go back to your gp !!!!!!! just one never ending vicious circle of hopelessness ................................. hope you are ok. wish you a good peaceful weekend keep intouch best ~Pete

Dear Dream warrior.

I am so sorry to hear that things have not improved at all. I am sending you a couple of links that may offer help or even leads to some solutions

http://www.ptsd.org.uk/
http://www.uktrauma.org.uk/
http://www.bullyonline.org/stress/ptsd.htm

I wish you some peace.
S

Hi Pete, hope you found some peace at the weekend. I'm sorry that you have been let down by the very services that should be supporting you. It makes me so angry that support is such a hit and miss thing. My experience of the mental health services has been a very positive one, and that should be available to all.

The weekend has been mixed for me. Very upset about my friends who all seemed to have high tailed it since I got my diagnosis. Time to move on for me I think.

Anyway when you feel alone just remember that there are people out there who care and that this forum is here for you and me and others like us.

Take care

Mags

Welcome to the site Dream Warrior, hope you find the help you need in here. I was told today by the therapist that I have been seeing for the past few months, that our sessions are having to be ended, as I am not responding correctly to them?

Pity really, as I had waited for well over year to be able to attend them. Thing is, how are we supposed to respond to therapy? I have no idea, and it looks like I never will now! So its back to talking to myself again? The nightmares never did stop, despite the therapy, in fact they got worse and more often after I talked about it at one the sessions.

So it looks like I am going to have to cope with the waking up in the middle of the night sweating after the nightmares, losing sleep, as I am too scared to go to sleep these days, and the mood swings. I suffer from anxiety as well, and to enter a busy store is really scary for me, and at times I just cant do it.

I will still pop in here on the odd occasion, if only to give support to someone who is going through the same thing, as its my belief that no body can understand it, unless they have gone through it them selves. See you all later folks

Hi gadgie. manythanks for your warm welcome & welcome to you , SORRY FOR LATE REPLY BEEN LAID UP .I feel so much for you as you've just hit it on the head there NO BODY CAN/ DOES UNDERSTAND what were expericencing unless they've actually gone thruogh it . As all the things you said about anxiety, going into busy shops etc.. its a nightmare catch 22 situation. as for your so called therapIst ! who just stopped like that is OUTRAGEOUS & UNPROFESSIONAL . WHAT YOU GOT TO REMEMBER IS THAT HES HAD TO LEARN ABOUT PTSD VIA TEXT BOOKS SO HE AINT GOT A DAMN CLUE WHATSOEVER - HES EMBARASSED & DOESNT KNOW WHERE TO TURN HIMSELF ( HES OUT OF HIS DEPTH BASICALLY & CANT ADMIT IT ), AS FOR YOU NOT RESPONDING ? WHAT THE HELL DOES HE EXPECT YOU TO RESPOND !....THATS WHAT HE WAS THERE FOR IN THE FIRST INSTANCE TO HELP YOU RESPOND ? WHERE IS THE MEANTALITY IN THIS SO CALLED PROFESSIONAL IDIOT . SORRY IT MAKES A ME SO MAD HOW THEY TREAT US ALL.. PLEASE DONT GIVE UP LIKEWISE IM HERE IFTO SUPPORT YOU LIKE OTHER MEMBERS ARE SUPPORTING ME - PLEASE FEEL FREE TO SEND ME A PRIVATE MAIL . HOPE YOU ARE HAVING A PEACEFUL WEEKEND . MY THOUGHTS ARE WITH YOU & FELLOW MEMBERS KIND REGARDS ~PETE

Hi DW, Many thanks for your reply, the therapist is actually female, but that in itself doesn't really justify the decision. I have one session left in a couple of weeks time, so I will ask what sort of reaction I should have had ?
Anyway, I was chuffed to read your reply as nothing seems to happen very often in here, I would have thought such a good outlet like this, would have more interest shown in it?
Ah! well, not to worry Eh! BTW, typing in capitals is taken as shouting in cyber world, just in case someone takes the hump,

Hi Dreamwarrior,

It sounds as though you've had a horrendous time of it, and it shouldn't have happened. You are entitled to be treated with respect.

Please check out the MIND website - www.mind.org.uk

I've just checked the site out for you and on the first page they have a section titled "Abuse by Health and Social Care Workers", (just below the alphabet) which gives valuable avice on finding an advocate to act on your behalf and to ensure that you get proper care.

Hope this helps. Take care,

Juli x